He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
