ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
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