Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Randomize