I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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