I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
