i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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