So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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