She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Can't talk, ducks in the car
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize