So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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