Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
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