D3 body, D1 cock
The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Randomize
