I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
he puts the penis in happiness.
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Randomize
