But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
life is too short to starve
life is also too short to be fat
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Randomize
