But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize