You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Randomize
