It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Randomize
