I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
