I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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