we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Randomize
