BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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