She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
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