Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Randomize
