why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
