I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
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