why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
Randomize