Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
