I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
