Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize
