Already got asked if we're dating
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
