idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Randomize
