What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize
