two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize
