Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
