a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize
