Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
