Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Randomize
