Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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