normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Randomize