I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
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