Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
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