he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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