I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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