I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
