"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Randomize
