First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Randomize
