They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
