I'm so fucking centered right now
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
