Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Your cock deserves a montage
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
