That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Randomize
