They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
