Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
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