Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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